Sheila Jutan’s Message for Passover 2026

What Does it Mean to be a Good Jew?
As Passover approaches, many of us are not only preparing our homes, but also quietly asking ourselves harder questions.

Am I doing enough?

Am I showing up the way I’m supposed to?

Am I a “good Jew?”

It’s an uncomfortable question, and for many people, it carries more pressure than inspiration.

In our community, being a “good Jew” is often associated with what can be seen. Going to shul. Keeping mitzvot. Learning Torah. Supporting Israel. These are important and meaningful parts of Jewish life. But when they become the main way we measure ourselves or others, something important can get lost.

At Hineni Toco Hills Mental Health Initiative, we see how much people are carrying that isn’t visible. The parent supporting a child through mental health challenges while trying to prepare for Yom Tov. The individual who shows up to the seder but is struggling internally. The person who feels overwhelmed, isolated, or simply exhausted, and is doing their best to stay connected.

The teaching, derech eretz kadmah l’Torah, means ethical, respectful behavior is the essential foundation that must come before Torah study. Before observance, before performance, before anything that can be measured from the outside, there is the responsibility to be a good person.

That means kindness. It means compassion. It means how we treat others, not only within our own circles, but anyone we encounter, regardless of their background or beliefs.

It also means how we treat ourselves.

A person can be doing all the “right” things and still be struggling. A person can be quietly holding a tremendous amount and still show up with dignity. That counts. That matters.

As we sit at our seder tables this year, surrounded by family and expectation, maybe the question shifts a bit.

Not “Am I a good Jew?” in the narrow sense. But rather:

Am I acting with kindness?

Am I making space for others?

Am I recognizing the humanity in the people around me, and in myself?

That may be a truer place to start.

Sheila Jutan is an Atlanta native, Sandy Springs raised, Toco Hills resident, and is the co-founder of Hineni Toco Hills Mental Health Initiative.