Maayan Schoen’s Rosh Hashanah Message for 2025

Maybe it’s a Southern thing that we say hello to our neighbors, but I was a little surprised recently, having just moved from Jerusalem to Tel Aviv, at the hello I received. My new landlord gave me the number of another building resident, the head of our housing committee, to ask for a mechanical key to the building that I could copy so that I wouldn’t have to use the electronic keypad on Shabbat. I reached out over text to introduce myself and ask for the key. In response, she called me on the phone to tell me that the building is not for people who observe Shabbat; it is for secular people only, and I would need to adjust myself to that and use the keypad on Shabbat, despite my beliefs and practice. And so on.

To be clear, there is a mechanical key, but she wanted to prevent me from having it. I was quite shaken at such forthright and blatant discrimination. I wrapped up the call with proper southern manners and contacted my landlord, who was thankfully horrified and later managed to procure the key for me in another way.

Several colleagues overheard the call and were super upset on my behalf, though mostly secular themselves. They encouraged me to escalate the matter legally and not to be shy just because I’m not yet confident at yelling and arguing in Hebrew. I joked right away that I should have invited the woman for Shabbat dinner.

When I called my parents a short time after, I expected my father, a civil rights attorney, to be outraged as well at this injustice. Instead, my parents encouraged me not to take it to heart, and to befriend this woman and show her my values and beautiful way of life. Why don’t you bring her some honey for Rosh Hashana, my mom suggested.

It is clear to me that a person who would call me up like that has something going on that upsets her that has nothing to do with me. It has been a long and very difficult two years for all of us, and you never know what anyone is facing at any given moment. That has always been true, but you see the struggle written on people’s faces a little more clearly these days and feel the sharp lines of division at a time when we need to come together more than ever.

My friends, it is time to drop the divisions. Our enemies don’t differentiate between us, and we must not either. Whether we need to remind ourselves to be dan lkaf zechut (judge others favorably), or drop our own prejudices, we can and must choose, every day, to come together with love. Perhaps there is nothing more cliche, and yet I can think of nothing else to say right now. Refuse hate in your heart. Don’t let anyone else draw lines for you. I will do as my mom suggested and bring my neighbor some honey. With respect for each other’s choices and familial love, we fight the dark hate that threatens to engulf us.

Maayan Schoen studied in the Migdal Oz Beit Midrash for Women in Israel and recently graduated from Yale University. She now lives in Jerusalem and is chief of staff for Deputy Mayor of Jerusalem and Special Envoy for Innovation Fleur Hassan-Nahoum.