A Boy Dreams of His Father’s Return

As he leaves home for his first day in third grade, a boy tells his mother about a dream he’s been having.

“That dad is here at home. He returned home and said that he received permission from Hamas to come only for one day and then return to Gaza. And a day after that he will be released,” the boy says.

Every morning, I check for news about the hostages kidnapped last Oct. 7, when Hamas-led terrorists attacked kibbutzim, towns, and a music festival in the “Gaza envelope” of southern Israel. This includes posts from the Israeli branch on my family tree, which is where I found the mother’s note about her son’s dream.

I make no pretense of understanding the grief and anxiety that they have experienced since that day, when the calendar pages stopped turning.

The terrorists who invaded Kibbutz Be’eri murdered one of the boy’s grandfathers, along with a great-aunt and -uncle. Their bodies were not identified for more than a week.

The boy was kidnapped — along with his father, mother, sister, a grandmother, another great-aunt and her daughter.

After 51 days in Gaza, six of the seven, the women and children, were freed in an exchange of hostages for prisoners held in Israeli jails.

But not his father.

At this writing, 97 hostages — one-third believed dead — remain in the bowels of Gaza. Hamas also holds two Israeli civilians who entered Gaza in 2014 and the bodies of two soldiers killed that year.

Those planning Oct. 7 commemorations face challenges: How best to honor the lives of the 1,200 men, women, and children slaughtered that day and the 250 kidnapped. How to demonstrate support for the Israeli people without becoming political, one month before the U.S. presidential election. How (or even whether) to acknowledge the discord in the Jewish community over the war in Gaza.

Two local events are being organized: Oct. 7, in the evening, at the Byers Theatre in Sandy Springs, and Oct. 27, in the afternoon, at The Weber School. The latter date is close to 22 Tishrei, the date of Simchat Torah on the Jewish calendar, the holiday Israelis were celebrating last Oct. 7. Future commemorations will be in accordance with the Jewish calendar.

Those planning Oct. 7 commemorations face challenges: How best to honor the lives of the 1,200 men, women, and children slaughtered that day and the 250 kidnapped. How to demonstrate support for the Israeli people without becoming political, one month before the U.S. presidential election. How (or even whether) to acknowledge the discord in the Jewish community over the war in Gaza.

The planning process in Israel has mirrored already existing tensions between the government of Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and many families of those killed and kidnapped.

An official commemoration, without an audience, will be held in Ofakim, a small city in southern Israel. According to published reports, some hostage families have asked that images of their loved ones not be used, and several popular entertainers have declined to participate.

In a post on “X” (formerly Twitter), the Hostage and Missing Families Forum said the decision not to have an audience “stems from the fear of the government and the minister [Transportation Minister Miri Regev, in charge of the event] to look the families of the kidnapped, murdered and displaced in the eyes and take real responsibility for the abandonment that began on 07.10.”

An alternative commemoration is being planned for Tel Aviv, in conjunction with hostage family groups, though some kibbutzim and families of the music festival victims may hold their own ceremonies.

As a compromise, Israeli President Isaac Herzog offered to host an event “without political trappings,” but reportedly was rebuffed by Regev, who has derided objections as “noise.”

Oct. 7 this year falls at the midway point of the “Days of Awe,” the 10 days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. At the start of the new year, we are told, the book of life opens and then closes on the Day of Atonement. In between, G-d determines who will live and who will die.

Netanyahu’s calculus has prioritized continuing the war over a ceasefire deal that would bring the return of some or all of the hostages. His position is not without support in Israeli society. Rightist ministers he recruited to form a 64-seat majority in the 120-seat Knesset have pledged to bring down the government if Netanyahu agrees to a ceasefire.

The large numbers of Israelis who continue to protest in Tel Aviv (upwards of 500,000 there on Sept. 7), in Jerusalem and elsewhere against the government contend that by making the hostages a secondary concern, Netanyahu has decided who will live and who will die.

Nadav Eyal, a columnist for the newspaper Yediot Aharanot, wrote on X: “The idea that Israel will do everything — not only through military force, which no one doubts, but also through political moderation and compromise — to return Israelis who were kidnapped, sometimes from their beds, by a cruel enemy, is central to the Israeli identity. And it is this part of the Israeli identity that the government has completely managed to unmoor by its actions. It is this part of the Israeli identity that people are demonstrating for.”

Meanwhile, a 9-year-old boy dreams of his father’s return.