Arlene Appelrouth’s Chanukah Message for 2024

We are living in a time of transition. Whether you focus on family dynamics, political polarization, changing mores and folkways, the landscape is shifting and it’s not easy adapting to the impermanence that is unavoidable.

My vision has become blurry. A diagnosis of macular degeneration took me by surprise and added fear and anxiety to my already complex world view.  I refuse to let this diagnosis darken my world.

Chanukah is the perfect time for me, and if you choose you, to, focus on the light. We all need more light and clarity in this ever changing world.

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I am a proud Jew who has been evolving and growing in my understanding of what it means to be born into this resilient, gifted tribe of humanity.

My roots include European ancestry. My relatives were both blessed and cursed to be in the minority of European cultures. In addition to the prejudice and pogroms, there were rituals and customs and specific expectations regarding living in this world.

My grandfather, of blessed memory, Gershon Weitzman, was a draft dodger in Poland. He ran away with the clothes on his back to escape conscription into the Polish army. His life, as a baker, wasn’t what he wanted to continue. He, and his girlfriend, my Babba, were raised with poverty because of the limited opportunities for Jews in the early 1900s.They blamed their poverty on their religion.

When they arrived in Canada, without friends, family or money, they left all vestiges of their Judaism behind.  But they never forgot about the prejudices inflicted on them because they were Jews.

They didn’t trust non-Jews. They were cultural, social Jews living a kosher style life. They were neither religious nor spiritual.

I was born into a G-dless home and not given any education about my history or any of my traditions. I was told the Jewish rituals were superstitious, but to always remember I was a Jew first.  It confused me because I had no way to differentiate Jews from non-Jews.  I saw all sentient humans as children of the same creation.

When I traveled as a college graduate, it was serendipity that I found myself in Israel, looking for a friend on a kibbutz.

It was love at first site. As a volunteer, metnadevit, I was welcomed by the haverim at Kibbutz Ein Hashofet near Haifa.

The idealism amongst the Israelis I met in 1969, was admirable and enviable. Life had meaning and was celebrated by all. America, at that time,, was riddled with polarization caused by the Vietnam War.

I was an anti-establishment, anti-materialistic, hippie like young woman.  Living on a kibbutz freed me from the shackles of the pervasive materialism in America. I wanted to live free of the politics and confusion of the crumbling mores of the time.  I wanted to experience kibbutz life and was invited to stay and commit to volunteering a month at a time.

My first day as a kibbutz worker started when I climbed onto. a flatbed truck.  About 20 of us were driven to the matayim, the apple orchards. The sidon avodah, master of the workers, has to fill out a sheet, listing the volunteers.

When asked what my. name was, I replied, “Arlene.” “Ma?”  what, I was asked, ORLI? “No Arlene,” I said, slowly enunciating the two syllables in my name. “Orli?” the Israeli said. “Lo,” I said using one of the few Hebrew words I knew.  “Arlene” “Orli,” his tone reflected frustration OK, Ok. Call me Orli. At lunch in the heder ochel, (dining room) I learned Or is Hebrew for light, and le means unto me. I loved it. And during my time in Israel, I went by Orli.  Orli Caplan, the journalist from Florida.

Eventually I returned to Florida and continued working as a feature writer and investigative journalist. I wrote using the name Arlene, given by my parents.

But Orli, and kibbutz values were imprinted on my heart and soul. When I was lucky enough to buy a boat, I named her Orli 2.

My life as Orli i filled with the light I see and the joy I share. As I get ready to light my Hanukkah candles, and express my gratitude to Hashem, who I am now better acquainted with, I am dealing with life’s inconsistencies and limitations, with the mindset of a being choosing to focus on the light. We cannot avoid the darkness of these times. But we have a choice of where to focus. We can bring light as we light the candles. You can call me Orli. I invite you to be the light in this world. Gamzu la tova. That’s Hebrew for it’s all for the good. My son, David, an orthodox rabbi, has brought the light, and wisdom of Judaism into my world. I’m grateful for my life and want to invite you to look for the light as you kindle the lights on your menorahs.

Arlene Appelrouth is a writer, a seeker, a mother, and a grandmother. She calls herself a flexidox Jew as she enjoys worshiping in Orthodox, conservative, and reform synagogues. She has been a student of Judaism for decades and is grateful for many close relationships with many rabbis. She is a senior, frequently adapting to changes in where and how she lives.